The Buffalo Boy

Holding a stick in my hand, seated high on my favourite pet buffalo, Kajal , I am off to the deserted grasslands on the outskirts of our village and then to wash my buffaloes of their grim and dirt in water. The grasslands are the remains gifted by the river Son (Yes, there are other rivers in Bihar too, apart from the great Ganges!). The river is all dried up, but it proves a boon to the people who grow their crops in its basin. When the river was fresh and young, I used to take my buffalos to its water to have bath, but now I have to take them to the village taalab (pond). I think it is the dirtiest place in the village. All sorts of activities can be seen happening here; women washing their load of clothes, children with their pets (Cows and Buffaloes, like me!) and men with their bare bottoms! It amazes me that women wash their clothes with the same water as men wash themselves with! More so, the green disease which can be seen increasing its hold from sides towards the centre of the pond; doesn’t seem to perturb anyone’s mind (but mine it does!).

Coming back from the pond is always a feast for the eyes (and sometimes the stomach!) The Jalal sweet shop which I pass on my way back home, makes the best jalebis in the world, I can bet on that! Jalebis you know? (I believe the city dwellers eat them too) The round hollow sweets made up of either dal or maida (I am not sure, what batter) which are filled with sweet syrup. They come in various shades, but I like the brightest of orange ones! As a kid I always thought that they are filled with syrup with the help of injections but now I see that Halwais dip the hot Jalebis in sugar syrup instead. It still amazes me that how the sweetness is imbibed by the Jalebis so well? Wish this sort of imbibition process of sweetness can be done by our religious leaders and politicians too, who only have sugar syrup sticking to their tongues!

My mother always asks me to bring Jalebis (When we can afford to) from Panditji’s shop since he is from OUR RELIGION, but I like them more from Jalal kaka’s shop (he even gives me one free of cost, when he sees me eyeing them with awe!) It makes me wonder how religion can affect the taste of the Jalebi?

I stay in a hut near the village temple. My house (People make a home; this is how my mother told me) is made up of mud and bricks-not the kind you see in the city (I know this because I went to city with my father once when grandmother would not stop coughing) You have to really bend low and enter through the door, otherwise you would bang your head. The thatched roof gives me bouts of sneezing, so I often get to sleep outside in open. But my sister is never allowed to do so. She is just 5 year old but already begun to feel the difference in conduct that a boy and a girl get in a small village as mine (Is it different in the city?)

Apart from taking buffaloes out for grazing and washing, I love sitting near the school wall in our village to watch children study. I have heard there is a scheme called Sarva Shiksha Abhiyaan which says all the children should study in school, but I guess education has more to do with changing the mindset of our elders who still feel that studying in school would do us no good. They often tell me even educated do not get decent jobs in today’s world (I am still to find out if it is true!)  Moreover I am not allowed inside the school on pretext of being one from the lower caste. I understand how work can define your caste (as done in olden times, as told to me by my grandfather) but how can birth do so is still a mystery to me!

Earlier I did not want to go for grazing out the Buffaloes lest I become the same all my life; but then my mother told me about Lord Krishna who used to take Cows out for grazing. He became one of the finest and most loved Gods when he grew up. Does that mean even I can become a God by taking cattle out for grazing?

Ripples in water

The ripples in water disturb the stillness of the large pond side. They weave different patterns on the surface of water just as life weaves new paths and destinations for us. It was a solitary moment for me, with just being with myself. I had bought the precious moment of peace-Rs 5 for visiting the Makbara of Sher Shah Suri in Sasaram District, Bihar.

It is a place visited by local people, not outsiders I guess! I could see the board for preservation of monuments set up, but what followed further was a different site to behold. We, Indians have a very unique habit of doing what we are told not to do! Do not write on the walls, do not stick posters and do not throw garbage in the pond, somehow escapes our eyes. You can almost always see vehicles parked in front of the board of NO PARKING.

The Makbara as it is called, is built on a huge expanse of land, surrounded from all sides by water. A narrow path takes you to the Makbara where the complete family of Sher Shah Suri is buried. It is a place quite so visited by pigeons, and of-course they leave their marks as on all monuments in India.

The late afternoon sun seemed to glow in beauty and give a wonderful aura to the surroundings. The huge red sandstone structure (46 metre high) is built on the main road to Sasaram (between I wanted to share that Sasaram has a FOUR LANE road to Kaimur; and it is a wonder in Bihar for me as I have been travelling in rusty old village roads till now!)

The ducks and birds from far off have flocked in the pond (whatever sorry state it may be in) reminding me of Sukhna lake of Chandigarh; one of my favourite places from my childhood. The sad part was that the filth and dirt that humans have made in this wonderful place cannot go unnoticed. Even the birdies refuse to flock at the places where they is garbage.

Another amazing thing that I saw today was that the left half of the pond was filthy with garbage where as right side was clean. How was that possible? The water on the left was still.

Our lives are same too, when we come face to face with some difficulties in life and our life becomes still, we tend to gather dirt and filth. In order to keep ourselves always clean, we need to keep on move (I am literally doing that, travelling to far stretched places!). Unless we move on and let go of our feelings of hurt and grudges, we cannot grow in life. The ripples must continue to be there to let a new beginning come in life!          

When?

It is as if I have woken up just today and gathered the courage to write what I most often thought about. A dialogue from a popular Hindi movie which says” Aaj choo kar gya hai, kal rape kar ke jayega!” (Today he has gone away by touching you, tomorrow he would rape you and escape.) The reality about eve-teasing stares all of us blank in the face, but are we able to deal with it in any way? Be it a metro or some small town anywhere in India, women are bound to suffer at the hands of those who believe that women are made to be admired by men. And what do the moral police do? As the 14 Feb, Valentine’s Day dawns we would see the police on grounds of morality beginning to focus on young couples to teach them a few precious lessons. How many of them raise a voice when a young girl is ogled at?

Why is that a girl of just 9 years, who doesn’t even know what changes have come across in her body, comes to know about it from the local goons? Why is that she is not able to run across to the guy on cycle, catch hold of him and give him a bashing for touching her? How many times have we been pinched or brushed against casually in a bus or a train?

It is a common story in almost every household of India where the girl is not able to point a finger at her Uncle who fondles her breasts the moment her parents are out of scene. She remains dumbstruck when the first kiss in her life is against those rubbery, slithering lips of a relative, who has come visiting to home and needs to be taken care of by the coy girl child. Why is that the girl cannot utter a single word, not even to her mother about any such incidents? And if she happens to mention it, “It happens to everyone”, is the most common reply!

Is there a law? If yes, then how many of us who seldom make the confession to their own mothers; would go to the law keepers for help?

Where are we lacking? What can be done? These are a few and more questions which arise in my mind many times, but are brushed aside due to many other important tasks on hand! But, when you hear about them or witness them in reality, the fire within awakens! The need is not to make this world a safer place by making any laws or forcing them on common public; it is about changing the mindset of the people slowly and gradually! Can Rome be built in a day? No it takes time, but yes Hiroshima and Nagasaki were destroyed surely in a day! Take your time to change the mindset of people, but don’t take too long so as the confidence and self respect of the mother of the universe breaks down!   

The World from my eyes……..

Once again it is those days of the month when the bright yellow linen has appeared everywhere. Near the banyan tree, on the entrance of the school, in the local bazaar and almost on every shop; one thing I take care of is that MY shop has the linen for sure! Have you people guessed what am I talking about?

 It is a campaign against one of the deadliest diseases that has survived in few states of India (including Bihar where I hail from). This disease cripples a man from the body as well as mind. It shocks the person to his core and leaves such a mark that cannot be erased over time (though everyone says time heals everything, but I guess that is a way to make a man move out of a heart-break most often). Polio as it is called, is one of the diseases which still affect about 1.6% of children in India (our doctor friend in the nearby village might tell you about it exactly, but I think I heard this figure somewhere), and if you are thinking how do I know about this disease so much, then let me tell u the bare fact that I am one of those unfortunate ones who have been affected by it.

The disease has unmercifully taken my lower limbs and I have to use my arms as my legs in order to walk around. I sit at the pan shop of my father, which I inherited after he left abode for heaven (or hell, who knows!) I sweep the floor in front of the shop every morning, but I have to pull myself a lot, mostly with help in order to go far from it! But, it was not like this always, yes this is a brighter part of the story, this deadly disease called Polio does not affect anyone from birth. It can be prevented! The meaning of this campaign itself is derived from this single fact-there are drops to prevent polio, and they are distributed free of cost (But, I believe you have to pay in order to get these drops in countries outside India, imagine how lucky we are!) Had Government not made these drops free of cost, half of children like me would be wriggling on the ground like caterpillars. I too wish to run and play and to be able to live my life without anyone’s help!

Oh here was I then at my part of the story. I was a very frivolous child from the beginning. As my mother used to tell me, I would never sit even when I was just a year old. I would roam around my home, (a slum in the heart of the city of Patna) to my heart’s content (perhaps my unconscious mind knew all the time that I would be affected by such a disease which would cripple me all along). Then, suddenly one night I had a bout of headache and sore throat followed by fever (I thought it was due to the ice-cream which I had in spite of my mother’s protests, how can u ever resist an ice-cream in summer?). The fever turned to diarrhea, and I could feel a very bad heaviness in my legs. It was almost evil, as though the witch who is mostly shown on the TV has caught my limbs! It was even worse; the witch would not let it go even in the morning! And it has not even let it go; even to this day, but today I know it is no black magic, but a disease which affects many people like me! It spreads with infection due to feces, which must be the most common thing in a slum. I have heard other diseases like diarrhea, TB and cholera also occur due to unclean surroundings. If we know all this, then why is that we dwell in the same dirty area, this I still fail to understand?

The Government has been running a lot of programs in order to eradicate this disease, so much that I heard all other Health programs have been suffering due to it! The Polio rounds (as it is called) are conducted every month for a week and you would see women roaming around the houses carrying a blue colour case, which is a vaccine holder (I asked one of them once and they told me it was to keep the polio vaccine cool in the hot weather); giving two drops to children and also marking out the houses who were closed (I asked them why, and they told me it was to come back and give the vaccine later during the week, but Do they really come back to each and every left out house?). Every child from birth till the age of 5 is given this vaccine every month to protect him/her from the disease (Yes, Government does not differ between girl or boy child for giving this vaccine for free) Another source, the ANM which comes to our village (on most days) told me that the disease affects those who have not taken the vaccine till that age. It was very unfortunate that I was not given this vaccine (I later confirmed the fact from my mother, who is as illiterate as my father was!) The program was started with such gusto after NRHM came into being in 2005 (I learned this too from ANM sister) I was born much before that, So, I guess I cannot blame anyone for my sorry state, but you still have a chance to spread the message and save as many children from this deadly disease!

I am not sad (but yes feel helpless sometimes) today, but indeed life would have been different otherwise. I am living life with honour today and fighting my own battles as encouraged by my father, who might be illiterate but was very sensitive to human emotions!

But I want my life to act as a reminder to all the men and women of small children (up to the age of 5) to give their child Polio drops every month and remove all the superstitions against this vaccine from their minds (I have heard some people believe that Polio drops lead to infertility in children, how ridiculous is that!) That is the reason, why the yellow linen with dates of Polio rounds can always be found at my doorstep month after month!       

Young Love! (Part-2)

The beauty of the night is unparalleled today. Lightning of the house cannot be even matched to the festival of Diwali! The house is full of glittering lights and bedecked with flowers of all colors; red, yellow, orange and pink. The environment is filled with the music of wedding songs and chatter of the gathering who have perhaps not met each other lately. The Aunts are busy around gossiping about the new daughter-in-law who is modern and not ready to keep a dupata on her head “even in front of elders”! Girls are running about to fix their last minute make-up and get ready to welcome the Baraat!

In the background, hums and chants of Panditji can be heard who is continuously pouring ghee in the “Havan Kund”. The aroma of sweets made in pure desi ghee is wafting in the pandal; making each one present hungry to gobble them up! Though caterers are roaming around the house offering snacks and cold drinks to everyone; children make it a point to rush to the waiter as soon as he appears from behind the curtain. There is only one gloomy heart in this festive season……… 

Donned in beautiful flowing dress, maroon in color just as her freshly polished lips, she sits in front of the mirror. Her jewelry shimmers in the low light of her room and she looks at herself; being transformed into a lovely bride from the girl next door. The delicately crafted jewels do not grasp her attention, for she is fiddling with a ring on her finger. It is a plain ring made of steel, which looks out of place with her stunning attire that night.

The scene of the fair that she went with him last year, doesn’t leave her memories. The giant wheel where she clutched him with all her force; and later winced in pain when she realized that she had hurt him so much……The Golgappa stall, where she had up to her heart’s fill! Stares of the onlookers hardly touched her for she was free as a bird in the sky, without a care in the world! Then unexpectedly, he had popped up a ‘beautiful ring’, which had delicately settled on her ring finger from then on.

She slowly removes it from her finger; opens her bedside drawer and keeps it in it, with all the treasure she has gathered in her childhood. There is a vast collection of small pebbles and shells which she had collected during her trip to the lonesome beach with her brothers and sisters. The visit to her Nani’s place last summer had been painful as well as memorable for her. Painful because she had stayed about 10 long days away from him; without any communication; but memorable yes, because she had done anything she had wished to in her childhood! There had been a drama where she had been decked as bride and danced to her heart’s desire…..

A soft knock at the door brings her back from her reverie and  she finds herself being the bride once again, but for real this time………….

It is her first Deepavali after marriage and she is sitting in front of the mirror in her room. It is a small room but carefully done up; painted in soft pink colour. Beautiful curtains from Gujarat hang on all the windows that her husband brought her during one of his trips there. Matching bedsheet, pillow covers and cushions adorn the sitting of the room. A small teddy sits by her bedside, pink in colour with a cute ribbon, which her young niece bought for her on her birthday! She has become familiar to so many titles now; she’s a Chachi to the cute Pari, Mami to the naughty Amit and the list goes on and on………..

There is a separate dressing room attached to the bathroom where she has spent many intimate moments with her husband. He likes her best just after bath, when her wet open hair give him a teasing feeling! A deep growl makes her remember that she has to wake up her husband to get ready for Puja in the house. She gets up and gently shakes him; he opens his eyes and smiles at her! For a fraction of second, she feels that there is nothing better in Life than the satisfaction that he is glad to see her; even after being woken up by her after the tiring journey he has had since last week! Is that Love????